Taking twelve young children nine hours across the world, from Hong Kong to Australia, taught me many things — never let them pack their own suitcase (No, one pair of socks for nine days was not enough), do NOT take your eyes off them before they put fifty pounds of their parents’ money into the claw machine, and that KPop Demon Hunters does, in fact, grow tiresome after the fifth or sixth watch.
But, it also illuminated what we, as adults, may have lost in this process of ‘growing up.’ Children know how to have fun. They eat what they want, rest when they need to, and don’t have time to overthink bad haircuts or wearing pyjama pants to the supermarket. Learning from children, and by extension our past selves, might just alleviate some of the symptoms of adulthood which only make us more boring, and often, miserable.
I would like to caveat by saying that so many of these attributes – the ability to live in the present, to eat with abundance – is a huge privilege and something to be recognised and cherished.
Children (mostly) live in the present. Children are generally not bogged down with what is happening tomorrow, or next week, but rather too stuck into the delights of what’s happening right now. “Let’s dress cute and go outside!” my little nine-year old beamed up at me one afternoon, having just unpacked his favourite pyjamas and put them straight on. What a joyous proposal! After all, if you can’t find fun frolicking in the sun donning your best rabbit onesie, when can you?
Moreover, not once did one of my children rearrange their plate for an instagrammable photoshoot before tucking into their meal (guilty). Children are not busy taking ‘content’, they’re scarfing down food to fuel their next activity – a film, a game, a forehead wrestling contest in the garden! While I think it’s important to hold gratitude and appreciate the connection that food brings us, to each-other and to the world, it was also refreshing to see such a no-frills, no-fuss approach to eating because sometimes, it’s just not that deep.
Children do not perform the way adults do. Children will tell you if your hair looks bad. They will tell you if something is boring, or if they just want to go home and slump. They are honest with their emotions in a way that adults have been socialised out of. It’s much easier to understand and connect with someone when you don’t have to wade through walls of manufactured emotion before reaching what they really think. Like the hologram circus we visited with no live performers, some things in life are just plain bad.
They eat intuitively. Ok, so I have never before consumed so many french fries in a single week. But, children eat with abundance and excitement. They understand their own appetites and cravings and hold no judgement for either. It doesn’t matter if you can only manage a few bites of a burger you’ve just bought. If you’ve got a hankering for grape candyfloss in the shape of Cinderella’s slipper, what’s holding you back?!
They rest intuitively. We took a pretty leisurely approach to travel on this trip. For every fifteen minutes of walking, a five minute bench or playground break was required. But how brilliant to be so in tune to your own energy levels, and to know exactly what is required to give yourself a recharge. Sometimes a quick go on the monkey bars is just what’s necessary to get you through the day.
Children know how to have fun. Mid-turbulence, my own anxiety growing, I turned to face my children … hands in the air, swaying from side-to-side, exclaiming “it’s like a rollercoaster!” Joy can be found in unexpected places, and children know how to make fun out of an empty field or a swaying plane.
They wear what they want, mostly for function. My nine-year-old was rocking inside-out trousers for most of this trip, unperturbed by the large exposed pockets waving around in the wind. His brother was also partial to a pyjamas-out-the-house affair. And it made me think, yes it might look a little strange, and while I do love fashion as a means of self-expression, sometimes you just need comfort and practicality, and everyone is way too caught up in their own lives to notice anyway!
Children are not afraid to be messy. Toys break, you spill ketchup down your white T-shirt and curry onto your shoes, life continues. (Most) children don’t have meltdowns when such accidents occur, because it does not serve you to do so. I was surprised by the small acts of resilience that these kids showed when, on a bad day, futile things like these can sometimes push me over the edge.
An abundance of arcades, K-Pop and plates of beige later, I think this trip has changed me for the better. There is power in embracing life with just a little more whimsy, a little less embarrassment, and a distinct respect towards your own wants and needs. Perhaps we all need to be a bit less adult.
